Fw: Ehsaan Khureshi

Ek din, main Delhipahuncha, Station pe ek coolie se bahar jane ka rasta pooncha. Coolie ne kaha: "Bahar jaake poocho."

Mainekhud hi rasta dhundh liya, Bahar jaake taxiwale se pooncha: "Bhai saab Lal Kile ka kitna loge?" Jawab mila: "Bechna nahi hai."

Taxi chod, mainebus pakad li, Conductor se pooncha: "Ji, kya mein cigarette pi sakta hoon?" Wo gurrra kar bola: "Hargiz nahi, yaha cigarette pina mana hai." Mainekaha: "Par wo janab to pi rahe hai!" Phir se gurrrraya: "Usne mujhse pooncha nahi hai."

Lal Kile pahucha, hotel gaya. Manager se kaha: "Mujhe room chahiye, satvi manzil pe." Manager ne kaha: "Rahane ke liye ya koodne ke liye?" Room pahucha, waiter se kaha: "Ek paani ka gilas milega?" Usne jawab diya: "Nahi sahab, yahan to saare kanch ke milte hain."

Hotel se nikla, dost ke ghar jaane ke liye, Raste me ek sahab se pooncha: "Janab, ye sadak kaha ko jaati hai?" Janab hans kar bole: "Peechle bees saal se dekh rahan hoon, Yahi padi hai... kahin nahin jaati."

Dost ke ghar pahucha, to mujhe dekhte hi chownk pada, Usne poocha: "Kaise aana hua?" Ab tak to mujhe bhi aadat pad gayi thi, Mainebhi jawab diya: "Train se."

Meri aaobhagat karne ke liye dost ne apni biwi se kaha: "Areeee sunti ho... mera dost pehli baar ghar aaya hai, Uuse kuch taja taja khilao." Sunte hi bhabhiji ne ghar ki sari khidkiya aur darwaje khol diye. Kaha: "Taji hawa kha lijiye."

Dost ne phir se baday pyar se biwi se kaha: "Areeee sunti ho, inhe jara apna chalis saal purana aachar to dikhana." Bhabiji ek baatli me rakha aachar le aayi. Mainebhi apnapan dikhate hue bhabiji se kaha: "Bhabhiji, aachar sirf dikhayengi, chakhayengi nahi?" Bhabiji ne taak jawab diya: "Yuhi agar sab ko chakhati To aachar chalis saal purana kaise hota?"

Thodi der baad dekha, bhabiji apne potey ko sula rah thi, Saath me lori bhi ga rahi thi: "Diploma so ja, diploma so ja." Lori soon mein hairan hua aur dost se poocha: "Yaar, ye diploma kya hai?" Dost ne jawab diya: "Mere grandson ka naam, Beti bambai gayi thi, diploma lene ke liye Aur saath mein ise le aayi, Isiliye hamne iska naam Diploma rakh diya." Phir mainepooncha: "Aajkal tumhari beti kya kar rahi hai?" Dost ne jawab diya: "Bambai gayi hai, degree lene ke liye."

Fw: Why Men Lie...

Why Men LieOne day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a treeabove a river,his axe fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord appeared andasked, "Why are you crying?" The woodcutter replied that his axe has falleninto water, and he needed the axe to make his living.The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe."Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.The woodcutter replied, "No."The Lord again went down and came up with a silver axe."Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."The Lord went down again and came up with an iron axe."Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.The woodcutter replied, "Yes."The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes tokeep, and the woodcutter went home happy.Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along theriverbank, and his wife fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lordagain appeared and askedhim, "Why are you crying?""Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"The Lord went down into the water and came up with Jennifer Lopez."Is this your wife?" the Lord asked."Yes," cried the woodcutter.The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding.You see,if I had said 'no' to Jennifer Lopez, You would have come up withCatherine Zeta-Jones.Then if I said 'no' to her, you would have come upwith my wife.Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three.Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care of all three wives, soTHAT'S why I said yes toJennifer Lopez."The moral of this story is: Whenever a man lies, it is for a good andhonourable reason, and for the benefit of others.That's our story, and we're sticking to it! -

"WE HONOURABLE MEN!!!!!!"..

Fw: SUCHANA

Agar aap bus,train,plane ya kahin se bhi aa jaa rahe hon aur kisi
mahila/ladki ke hath mein phool,dhaga,chain ya chamakti hue koi bhi vastu
dekhein to turant wahan se bhag jaye.Ye vastu RAKHI ho sakti hai. Apki zara
se laaparwahi apko BHAI bana sakti hai.


Bharat Sarkar dwara purush hit me Jaari.
Aapki suraksha aapke haath me

Fw: Salary

Ek Aadmi ne apni wife ko khat likha "Is mahine salary ke badle 100 kiss
bhej raha hoon".

Wife ne jawab diya Aap key salary ke badle 100 kiss milay:

Hisaab bhej rahi hoon -

Doodh wala 2 kiss mein maan gaya,
Bijli waale ko 7 deni padi.
Subjiwala 7 mein nahin mana is liye 9 deni padi.
Kiranewala sirf kiss se nahin mana - usko aur kuch bhi diya.
Makaan malik to roj 6 -7 ley jata hai.
Aap chinta mat karna, mere paas abhi lagbhag 35 aur hai.
Mahina aaram se kat jayega.